{"id":1026,"date":"2016-06-05T15:06:29","date_gmt":"2016-06-05T23:06:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/?p=1026"},"modified":"2021-07-01T17:04:30","modified_gmt":"2021-07-02T01:04:30","slug":"there-is-nothing-to-announce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/there-is-nothing-to-announce\/","title":{"rendered":"BREAKING NEWS: There is Nothing to Announce"},"content":{"rendered":"

— NOWHERE LAND<\/p>\n

Welp. There’s no new art.<\/p>\n

What, then, are we going to do with this post? What’s the point if there’s nothing to show you?<\/p>\n

Well, I was hoping we could just hang out, you know? No real plans, just chill. Bring a book to this post, snuggle up, and read while you read, dawg. We don’t need a reason to get you over here, do we? This feels like friendship.<\/p>\n

Settle in, friend. Spend some time here at mattcarpenterart.com. Look around. Check out the gallery<\/a>. Read these words. Read some of the words above these. Read some of the words down below. You don’t even have to do it in order if you don’t want to. No pressure. I won’t judge if you want to just read random words from each sentence. Backwards. Do what you want.<\/p>\n

Fuck it, man. There are no rules. We could even end this sentence with a comma,<\/p>\n

Fuck it, man? I’m going to end sentences with question marks from now on? That changes the way you read it? I don’t even care?<\/p>\n

How have you been recently?<\/p>\n

Oh shit, really? I’m sorry to hear that. Well, Dog works in mysterious ways, so don’t lose fate. I mean farts.<\/p>\n

I’m felling stronge write know. Does I looks okay!? WHOLEY SCHIT EIM HAVING AE FUCKEENG – ***ACHOOO!*** damn, excuse me. I’m still getting over this virus. I went to a festival<\/a>, treated my body like a rental<\/a>, and came home a little sick.<\/p>\n

Oh wait, there IS some art. There are a couple new animations, actually! Here, point your viewerballs at this:<\/p>\n

Movement!!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

While making that one, this other one kinda just came together. Aim them peeperballs at this bad boy:<\/p>\n

That’s Matt Carp Enter Art<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So yeah it turns out we did have SOME stuff<\/a> to show. That’s about it, though. Oh, this one as well.. Use your headballs to zero in on this:<\/p>\n

Pretty?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Anyway, you were saying things are going great and are expected to get even better? Nnnnnice! I’m proud of you. You’re doing a really good job, as far as I know. I can only go by what you tell me.<\/p>\n

Are you really being honest with me? Things are going that well? Oh. I see.. You just said that because you don’t want to talk about what’s going on.<\/p>\n

That’s fine. We won’t talk about it. It’s not like I would understand, I mean my head fell off last week but whatever, I could never understand loss or pain or struggle or anger or confusion or even hangnails, I get it. I get it: you think I don’t get it.<\/p>\n

You know what? I think maybe it’s time you write.<\/p>\n

I mean, maybe it’s time you left.<\/p>\n

I just wanted to have a nice time with a friend and now you’re over there lying to me and judging me, thinking I couldn’t ever understand you. This is upsetting, and I think you should branch.<\/p>\n

I mean, I think you should leaf.<\/p>\n

There’s the window. See yourself out, please.<\/p>\n

Oh, you’re too good for windows? Fine, I’ll take you up to the door on the roof.<\/p>\n

Oh, you can’t fly? Well shit, no wonder you’re so irritable. Here.. there’s the door to the shredded floor. The door to the GROUND floor, I mean. Ground, not shredded.<\/p>\n

Hey though are you sure you don’t want to stay? There are more words down there if you’d li– ok that’s fine. Here, don’t forget your jacket, and take these warm biscuits if you want. You remember where you parked? Probably on Facebook.<\/p>\n

OK, bye, thanks for stopping by! Let’s maybe do this again soon, orr.. uhh no? Yeah? no? no. OK well we’ll talk later I’m sure. Byee!<\/p>\n

Boy am I glad that person’s gone. I think that fucker stole my biscuits, can you believe that shit? What a relief they’re finally gone, though, so now we can hang out real intimate-like. Wait, who the fuck are you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

— NOWHERE LAND Welp. There’s no new art. What, then, are we going to do with this post? What’s the point if there’s nothing to show you? Well, I was hoping we could just hang out, you know? No real plans, just chill. Bring a book to this post, snuggle up, and read while you … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “BREAKING NEWS: There is Nothing to Announce”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1026","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-site-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1026","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1026"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1026\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2419,"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1026\/revisions\/2419"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1026"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1026"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mattcarpenterart.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1026"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}